Discussing your problems to someone you love is the best way to get help and solutions to the problem.
“If one pretends to be dead, mourners will pretend to bury him alive,” is one of the thousands of African proverbs meant to educate, shape our lives and inspire us, as each proverb carries moral lesson, advice and wisdom. This particular proverb speaks against pretending.
As imperfect human beings we are responsible for both the good and bad things we do. Which ever way one takes it, to pretend is also considered to be something bad. The question is why do people pretend? According to a study, pretending has both advantages and disadvantages.
Sometimes one needs to pretend. For example, when all of a suddenly in a cinema hall, a gun man on a shooting spree takes everyone by surprise without any escaping route, pretending to be dead among those already dead could save your life. But in other ways, pretending can cause self destruction, depression, loneliness and other psychological problems. How?
The pressure in the society is enormous. Things are not going well, yet many people prefer to hide their problems behind false smile. If you don’t share your problem with your family or a trustworthy friend, how can someone know your problem to give the attention or help you need? Researchers reveal that hiding a problem behind a false smile or faking happiness, is more likely to bring you harmful feelings.
You might not be happy with your job, because your boss or a colleague is sexually harassing you, exploiting you physically, emotionally and mentally, yet you wear a false smile behind such psychological scars. Instead of pretending to be okay, it’s always better to tell your problem to someone to receive help.
Many wish to be someone, because of the extravagant lives other people live. But we must be careful for what we sometimes wish for. We must be content with whatever we have to live a happy life. Don’t let your neighbour’s expensive car, push you to live beyond your means, and put on a fake smile, deceiving people that you are living great, while you know that you are struggling to make ends meet.
In Africa and other countries around the world, many are believed to be sick of HIV, but scared to go and see the doctor, because they aren’t ready to be told they have contracted HIV or Aids. They rather prefer to hide their problems with fake smile, forgetting that no one drinks medicine on the behalf of a sick person.
To pretend that everything is okay, while suffering, is not good for our health, we must therefore confide our problems to those close to us for help and solutions. That’s the only way we can overcome and defeat our problems.
One of Marilyn Monroe’s quote which reveals how unique, special and different a woman is.
I am a married man for the past 21 years, yet I can’t say I know a lot about women. My wife gets angry with me sometimes, when I know I’m right and she is wrong. But since I don’t want to lean upon my understanding, which may be wrong, I quickly apologize to her to create a happy atmosphere once again.
I work at a place with over forty female teachers. I ‘m always scared to smile, paranoid may be, because I don’t want any of the ladies there to have in mind that I want her. I therefore maintain a serious mood at my work place. Unfortunately, I was doing more harm to myself than good.
In the first year, I realized pure hatred from some of the teachers towards me. Action speaks louder than words, so don’t ask me how I know that they hate me please. In fact, some people can’t control their emotions when they hate you. Many pretend they haven’t seen me, even though I’m very close to those tempting bodies, fashion and magic perfumes.
The hate towards me increased to a certain level that I decided to find solution immediately, to present myself a faithful and trustful person among them. I started greeting those I’ve never greeted at the school before. Some just walked away without response but some gave me recognition and responded. That encouraged me to continue the greetings.
Did I forget myself as an African, when there is a proverb in Africa that says a woman is a beautiful flower in the middle of the garden and the man is the fence around it? Did I also forget that in Mexico, it is said men that treat women very good were brought up by queens? “If she’s amazing, she won’t be easy. If she’s easy, she won’t be amazing. If she’s worth it, you won’t give up. If you give up, you’re not worthy. … Truth is, everybody is going to hurt you; you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for.” Did I also forget this great quote from the reggae legend Bob Marley?
Once you have a clean heart and ready to change things in your life, you will be successful. I became friendlier with broad smile on my face daily. Once I met one of the ladies who hate me most, with a cup of coffee in one hand and books in the other hand, trying to open a door and I rushed like the late Christopher Reeve in his Super Man series, to open the door for her.
An African proverb revealing the greatness and importance of a woman in the society.
It was that very day, she asked of my name and she told me hers. Since then we communicate regularly and laugh over many things. In life, never judge a woman wrongly. Like every human being, some are introvert and others extrovert. Some may be very quiet but that doesn’t mean that they hate you, while others quickly engage in conversation with you.
So what is it like to be a woman? Don’t feel great or superior over a woman. Respect her opinion and don’t underestimate her. That will open the way to know her very well to understand the sort of creatures women are.
Does it seem like you’ve tried everything in your power to think creatively; and yet, despite your best efforts, you’re still plagued with:
• Not knowing how to even get started
• Not understanding even where to start with defining your intent
• Not knowing how to master your creative skills
If this describes you, then you are in luck today…
First, you are NOT alone! Although it may seem like it sometimes, but not knowing how to get started with creative thinking is far more common than you’d think.
I ought to know, because I’ve been in the same spot before…
There are some people who naturally have the skills, while others need to practice and learn about it first before they can take advantage of it. Being able to think creatively is very important, especially if you want to become successful in your career or in your whole life. However, only some people get to realize this fact.
Let me explain…
Creativity can be triggered with specific things, especially when the person involved has the natural ability to do so. For a person with some natural creative thinking skills, it naturally occurs even if he or she is not well aware of it.
And the worst part of all is that the more you don’t know the less you will succeed!
Make no mistake about it… As a person just like you who has struggled with getting better ideas, I have searched high and low to find the best strategies to fix this problem and I am fully qualified and equipped to help you put an end to your frustration with trying to wade through all the info you need to know to use creative thinking!
What exactly is creativity? Indeed, there are a number of ways you can define the word “creativity”. However, the most modest way to define this mysterious element that is shared by all people is the fact that creativity is the ability of the person’s mind to acquire facts, materials, and/or ideas and distinguish them in a distinctive manner or way. It is a unique point of view, a fresh idea and/or a new way on looking at a certain problem.
And all of this up till now is just scratching the surface!
This powerful book will provide you with everything you need to know to be a success and achieve your goal of becoming a creative thinker. The question is− are you ready to astound yourself with your new creative thinking skills?
Pursuing Your Creativity− Cultivating Your Imagination One Creative Thought at a Time”